“...I wouldn't care if you were a prostitute, and that you hit every man that you ever knew. You see it wouldn't make a difference if that was way before me and you. And you don't ever have to worry about me, as long as you keep it real. Whatever is on your mind, you speak on how you feel. Stay truthful to me, never lie to me, and don't ever keep no secrets. No matter whatever, Girl, you know what I mean.”
--- Musiq Soulchild
“Must be nice”, once said Lyfe Jennings, to find true love in our lifetime. He then added: “Having someone who understands the life you live, having someone who's slow to take and quick to give. Must be nice, having someone who sticks around when the rough times get thick, someone who's smile is bright enough to make the projects feel like a mansion. Must be nice, having someone who loves you despite your faults, having someone who talks the talk but also walks the walk. Must be nice, having someone who understands that a thug has feelings too. Someone who loves you for sho'...”
Like if I never left this living room, I am right back where I started. All through the night, my fingers anticipated the warm touch of this laptop's keyboard. My eyes were wide awake, in the dark bedroom, like a convict yearning to see the sunlight caressing his tattoos as I kept tossing and turned, just like a Mother-to-be aching to hold her Haitian adoptive newborn child. However, my breathing is the only obvious difference from yesterday, it grew heavier like a old rusted roman gladiator ready to reclaim his past glory with blood in his eyes. “It’s you and me, and there can only be one standing...” as I crack each fingers ready to set my blazing mind free with each clicking letters from the keyboard. “It’s you and me, Eve’s of the world” and only lack of time to get back doing my work stands between us. Until then, with a respectful smile, I say: “It’s on, let the truth set us free”.
Hello “Love”,
It’s me again dearest sweet love, previously we’ve unearth that the first step to reach your loving arms was to set our sight on a relationship journey instead of an anxious destination point. Our defiant second step, taken up the love later, was to secure time to love our self first. Before even thinking of sharing our mind, body and soul with another prospective soul mate, one needs to wash away childhood stain behaviours, seal in a goodbye kiss the hurt and pain from previous unhealthy relationship experiences. Why must you compare him/her with her/him? Wasn’t the past meant to stay in the past? Will we forever remain a slave, hauling on our bag of issues from one abominable relationship to the next? Have you asked yourself, lately, who am I? Better days are ahead child, keep your head up, heaven in the sky is shown to just be a peaceful state of the mind. And keep asking yourself, do I start to love myself, first, or keep running on empty for someone else to do it for me?
Without any particle order the next steps up the later consist of these essential features. True love is:
Planning: Within a loving relationship, plan to leave a legacy behind of your actions in love for the next generation to keep learning from.
Survival: Whether you know it or not, a cat won’t mate with another cat with a broken leg. Then, why wish to be with someone who takes advantage of your trust, negative mental attitude, is disrespectful, selfish, a chronic con artist liar or a faithful disciple of the insecure club? Isn’t life dramatic enough with its own twists and turns? Do you need more drama in your life? Beauty in life still remains even with its ups and downs, add color in yours by choosing the right mate who will go the distance by your side. Until that day come, be content by yourself and be grateful for family and friends for company.
Self-discipline: Does it make sense? How can Mary Magdalene affirm she truly love St-Luc, yet still keeping an intimate sexual bound with St-Paul? Is self-discipline achievable when in love? How many nights must St-Peter spend at the watering hole, before his wife starts shedding tears? So simple, yet we neglect to acknowledge the consequence of our own selfish actions.
Choice: Love is knowing what you really want, and have the choice to chase it or letting it past you by.
Nutrition: Too much fast food will lead you to depression. Junk nutrition will hurt your pocket book as well as your body organs. Take time for yourself and learn to cook. your body is your temple, maintain with a balance meal from the four food groups. Your sex life will thank me later! ;)
Patience: Love is a journey, take patience with each other in every task. However, patience doesn’t mean wasting time either.
Good communication: Take notice that good was mention and not great. There will always be missed communication or a breakdown in the signals. Whether in a blog, verbal, none verbal or in a posted letter. Whether in your actions, via words on the phone or in a poem, do your best to communicate. Let your mate know what is lodge in your heart, your actions and in your mind. The more communication is shared between the two lovers, smother the up hill climb towards true love will become. Can someone please explain the difference between “being in love with you and loving you”? or having “a friend” “a special friend” “a girl/boyfriend” or a “wife/husband”? To me ain’t no difference within these self imposed title or play on words, ‘cause when he/she is gone, the tears will flow just the same regardless or the word of choice. Ain’t it a crying shame, missed communication will lead a person who made you laugh, make you cry. Communicate! Talk the talk and follow with walking the walk.
Positive energy: Show positive karma together, alone or in a group. Think, believe and achieve positive aura daily.
Trust: In my observations, an insecure jealous person is 98% the one who will commit an affair. Ain’t it funny! So, set example with your own actions not your just your loving words. Ovoid doing onto others what you wouldn’t want done on to you. Lead by actions, too. Place trust on to yourself, by walking a straight line, and pray that your partner will take notice and follow too.
Sex: Read “When Eyes Meet: Part two”
Smile: Smile, laugh and live stress free together daily, is what Dr. Love orders.
Be grateful: Tomorrow is never promised, yesterday is long gone, as you must remain grateful for today. For each hour, good actions, kind words, etc. be grateful within and for each moments spent together.
Exercise: Good health simulates good mental health, equals a peaceful mind set. Exercise even alone, but it's much more fun together.
Caring: Like a mother’s touch, be near and alert to bring the love back to a healthy peace of mind. Never be too far for a hug, a kiss or a phone call to your man/woman.
Faithful: Real love is blinding, it places a blindfold for you to only have eyes for each other.
Etc: ...
Peace of the mind: The last step of love has to be a maintained peace of the mind within a lasting loving relationship.
To all the Eve’s of the world, including the one that lives inside me, we both can lay down our mask and come to a truce with the naked truth stated above. We both have better things to do with our time then to battle. Use your new found knowledge powers for good, young Jedi, as I will do the same. Must be on my way, must returning to my calling. Like Whitney Houston would sing and say: “...I hope life treats you kind, and I hope you have all you've dreamed of and I wish you joy and happiness. But, above all this, I wish you (piece of the mind) (true) love*”.
* ;)
---To be continued.
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